I've been tagged!

Seven random things about me:

1. I can sew. I know most people know this, but in a day and age when few people do, it might seem random.

2. This might be a downer and most of my readers already know this, but I have a rare acquired blood antibody (kell) that could threaten any future pregnancies. It's kind of like Rh negativity but much more rare with no known cure or treatment.

3. I can't stand to hear or see anybody cut, chew, chomp, or grind ice with their teeth or any other tool.

4. I am a terrible housekeeper.

5. I have never broken a bone. I've always assumed it's because mine are so big.

6. I would honestly make a batch of brownies right now just to eat the batter.

7. I don't really like chocolate chip cookies.

I tag Andrea S. and Kari R.

Whew!

What a week! Even though I have been here at home the week and weekend, I've had a lot of projects to finish up on. I finally got all my clothes priced for the consignment sale (I still need to check for ironing needs--yes, you heard me right, it has to be ironed or they supposedly won't take it. I have had them cull some of my stuff for minimal staining or wear, also), had my friend Deana's shower today, and finished an art project for her baby room this morning at 3 am. I didn't have to have it finished by today, but had I not finished it while I had it out, my house would have been turned upside down while I waited to finish. I also got few bow orders last night and would like to get those completed either tonight or tomorrow night.

Friday night, we went to a cookout at a friend's house who has a son Tate's age and a daughter Avery's age. It was wonderful weather and company. The kids had a good time. I tried. Being at events where Tate is with age matched peers is often very hard for me. I may blog about that later..... but not tonight. This post is not meant to be that deep ;)

So, tomorrow, I have to drive to Jonesboro to drop off my consignment clothes. Doing this sale can be a real hassle for me, but it's worth it in the long run to get that little extra money in a few weeks. I always take on too many things at once. Why does it always seem like everything always hits at once?

Anyway, I'm leaving you with a picture of the canvas I made for Deana's baby. We saw these at a boutique children's store in Jonesboro for $250! Of course I think, "I can make that!" But after finishing, I realized that those things are worth every penny of that $250. It was very time consuming--- lots of layers of paint and mod podge drying. I am going to try to make Avery one for her room while I have it in my head. Of course hers will be much more girly and HAS to have some bling on it.



Sorry to bore you with my crafts! Have a good week!

The Logical Choice

A conversation between Tate and I while we were watching the vice presidential debates:

Me: Tate, who would you vote for, if you could vote? Barack Obama or John McCain

Tate: John McCain

Me: Really? Why? What have you heard about him that makes you want to vote for him?

Tate: Well, I can't say that other guys name

Too busy to blog

Sorry I've not posted in a while. I've been super busy trying to get some things done. I've been working on some hairbows that Kristi's mom takes along to craft shows with her children's clothing, planning a shower for a friend, making some things for my house, and getting some clothes together for a biannual consignment event. On top of it all, I'm cooking our twice a month supper for church tomorrow night. Maybe these pictures will give you an idea of how busy I've been. Hopefully, I'll have something profound to post about in the next few days, but for now, you're stuck with some pictures of my junk.

Hairbows!!!!

I got this idea from a link from Nester.

I'm hoping this will grant me some more spending money!

Was it a depression?



I started out the weekend in a funk.

You know, the kind where you just can't figure out what is wrong but you can't stop crying. Sometimes I wonder if it's depression. Rob insisted that I explain what was wrong, but I couldn't. I prayed hard that it would pass. I also decided on a little "friend" time, some good food, a little wine (to be honest), and some retail therapy.

It helped.

I came home Saturday evening, took two Tylenol PM (wine headache), and thought a good deep sleep might clear my mind. Then I realized I couldn't sleep. Isn't that crazy? Even with Tylenol PM? Anyway, I was up every hour. And finally, at about 2:00, I realized that I was not going to be able to sleep anyway because the wind was blowing like crazy. I had just received a weather text from TWC indicating that we were under a "high wind warning". I wasn't really worried. We have very few trees in our fairly new neighborhood and it didn't seem too bad. But then I started to worry about my grandparents. They live in an old neighborhood with one of the oldest trees in Walnut Ridge in their front yard. That tree has to be over 6 or 7 feet in diameter. Just one limb falling from that tree could obliterate their house. I prayed hard over it and tried to sleep some more.

We were up and down for the next few hours watching the lights flicker and listening to the creak of every piece of wood in our house. It made me quite uneasy. At 5:30, it seemed that our electricity was gone for good. We rode out the rest of the morning a little stuffy, trying to catch a few more winks. I did get to have a really good dream where I got to tell someone I don't particularly like how much I don't like them. It was a very therapeutic dream ;)

At 7:00, daylight called and we rolled out of bed to survey any damage in our yard. Our yard seemed clear. Then Rob's dad called to tell us that a tree in my mom's yard (actually it was just about at our property line with hers) had been uprooted. As I said, trees are few in our neighborhood and this one was easily one of the biggest we had--a beautiful weeping willow that had become known as "the secret tree" to my children and their Nanny. We were glad no one was hurt, but we were all a bit sad to lose an old friend.

We spent the rest of the morning without power. Most of the town was without power and we called off services at our small church because we had no power there, either. Seems that all of the power crews were deployed to Texas this week (including my brother) and only a skeleton crew was left behind here in Arkansas. Needless the say, the power companies were not prepared for the amount of damage here and, honestly, they were most needed in the more devastated state of Texas.

Being without power, however, was a true blessing. There were no TVs and no internet. We ate french toast (we never have french toast). We opened the windows and let the now gentle and cool breeze blow through our house. We went for a stroller ride and then a car ride around town to see the rest of the damage. We ate lunch with friends at a restaurant in Pocahontas that had power and came home to find our electricity was on. The entire family came to see the tree cut apart. It was sad, but it was such a good day.

The winds were, of course, the remnants of Ike passing over Arkansas and, I heard they were considered a "tropical depression" as they moved through. Maybe the winds were enough to blow my threatening "depression" away. Maybe God knew just what I needed. I sure hope so.

**Here are some picture of the secret tree. The picture at the beginning of the post was from about two years ago**

**And BTW, my retail therapy resulted in an adorable furry little brown dress coat and hat for Avery at TJMaxx and some pumkins and pedestals for my mantle. Watch for pictures! They are both brag worthy**

Who Am I and Why Am I HERE?

When I graduated from high school, there was no doubt that I would go to college. Nobody asked me if that was what I really wanted to do or even assumed that I would choose anything different. My parents were hard working, middle class parents with high school diplomas. They proved to me every day that life would have been so much easier with a secondary education.

When I graduated from college, there was no doubt that I would get a job. Although my son was born one week before I graduated with my master's degree, I knew that at some point, I would go to work.

And I did go to work. I was blessed to have my mother in law to be a caregiver for my son while I was at work so I had minimal guilt for leaving him. And, when the time came, he started public kindergarten in our small, rural town in Northeastern Arkansas. My daughter, who came along 5 years later, stays with my mother in law as well and will start public preschool in January.

I've never felt guilt about working outside of the home. I've never felt guilty about sending my son to public school. Until now.

Recently, I have become much more aware of the unspoken battle between stay-at-home/homeschooling moms and working moms. I've heard lots of SAH moms talking about "their calling", being "fully mom, fully wife", and the advantages of homeschooling your children. But I hear very little justification from the other side. My side.

Just recently, I've started to feel guilty. But the guilt is not due to any family concerns that are calling me to stay home. (Except the fact that I am feeling pulled in a gazillion directions because my husband is working full time and is going to school full time--but this is a short term problem) The only explanation I have for my guilt is worrying about what others are saying about what their reasons are for staying at home and homeschooling. Don't get me wrong, I'm not blaming anyone for my guilt. But, it has got me to thinking about the justifications for my decision to send my kids to school and work outside the home.

I haven't come to any profound decisions about why I work. Sure, I feel that my job is somewhat rewarding and sometimes I feel like I might be helping somebody. But why are those people more important than my own children? Why isn't God calling me to put them first? Am I wrong?

I also realize that God has a definite plan for our lives. Often, I look back and think about the experiences I have had in the workforce. I have definitely been blessed by several Godly friends that I know God placed in my life that I would have never have encountered had it not been for working outside the home.

So whether my decisions in the past were based on selfish desires, I'm not sure. I wonder if my decisions were just made based on what I "knew"--this is what I was supposed to do. Maybe I was called by God to make those decisions. All that I know now is that I can't worry about the decisions I made in the past. At this time in my life, working is not an option either financially or personally. I have to make the best of what I've made of my life and pray that God will meet me where I am.

My goal is to become a living example of what a Christian woman looks like. No, I won't have time to teach my children the Torah or any verses in Hebrew, for that matter. But I hope to make my life a living example. I want to show my children that taking what is not mine is wrong and that giving to others is paramount. If I have to do this at Wal Mart on the way home from school or at a quick trip to the gas station or waiting in line at McDonalds because we are eating out again, then so be it.

I won't boast that my plan is the best way, because I don't know that it is. I can't even say that I have directed my decisions by a set plan. I do know that the Lord has a plan for my life and that sometimes following it seems hard. I'll just trust that He knows best.

Proverbs 19:21

"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails."

It was the best of times.......???

Last Sunday night, Amanda and Jeremy and Rob and I took our kids to the Redbirds game in Memphis. Typically, these games are very laid back, with small crowds and a real small town atmosphere.

Well, evidently, we picked the wrong game.

It was the last series of the summer and the last game where they have fireworks after the game. This drew a record crowd - over 18,000 fans. We ended up buying standing room only tickets (we all got in for $24 with some coupons-yea!) so technically, we had no seats. We ended up sitting in a section where my mom, Fred, and my brother's family were sitting. It was an interesting evening, to say the least. I can't go into all of the detail. But, let me tell you a few words to describe the event: HOT, LONG, LOUD, CROWDED, OVERSTIMULATING, HOT. The combination of these things was a little much for all of us. Especially when two of the four children have sensory processing issues and one of the four is potty training. I seriously don't remember watching even one second of the actual ballgame.

To make a long story short, it was the best of times...... it was the worst of times. We were so glad to get out of the house and spend some fun times with our friends and family. It was worth it.

The lady in charge of the slide was a bit passive, to say the least. Her attempts at getting the kids off of the slide when their turns were over had me laughing my head off. We finally had to wrangle them off ourselves

Addie, Avery, and Mason

Tate and Maddox (his cuz)

P. S. I didn't forget about Friday Favorite........... Sarah Palin. No apologies.

Friday Favorite(s)

I've discovered a couple of new things in the past few weeks and this weeks favorites are very, well, random to say the least.

First, I've been eating diet frozen lunches for a while now and haven't found anything new or even somewhat tasty in this department since I burned myself out on the Lean Cuisine panini when it released a year or so ago. But, I recently tried a Lean Cuisine Margarita pizza that is more than decent. I'm sure I will eat enough of them in the next few weeks to remind myself that diet food should never be listed as a "favorite" food.

Okay, I admit it.

I love Contemporary Christian music, but I often listen to *gasp* secular music, as well. I love the nostalgic feeling I get when I hear a song from somewhere in my past and I like to think I'm cool enough to keep up with some Top 40 stuff, too.

So, today's other favorite is XM 22. It's my favorite satellite radio station. It's a great mix. Today I heard Coldplay's Viva la Vida followed by Prince's Let's Go Crazy and then Verve Pipe's The Freshmen. It was like experiencing a multisensory photo album. Where else could you find such a great mix?

I'm realizing that my "favorites" are so sad. I mean, really, a cleaning product, a diet pizza, and a radio station? My life is so sad....... ; )

I caved (a Friday unFavorite)

Well, I swore that I would never buy my children character shoes. But tonight I did. Avery saw these shoes in a magazine and was in love. When we saw them at WalMart tonight, she had to have them. And, what can I say, I caved. Not only are they *cringe* Strawberry Shortcake, they are *cringe* light up........... can you say ugh? Oh well, I 'm hoping she will settle for wearing them as play shoes, but..........


..... I'm afraid that the fact that she had to put them on before bed tonight with her gown is a bad sign. A quick Friday Favorite for ya..... I was looking for a way to make Tate's room more "thematic" without going overboard and I found this vinyl guitar on ebay and I think this might be just enough. He really likes it.

Sweet

A few weeks ago, I found out that Elmo was coming to town. You know, the stage show where an enlarged Elmo and Sesame Street entourage bound around on stage singing all your old PBS favorites. I so wanted to buy tickets for Avery and me, but just could not rationalize the $45 dollars that it would require.

I was a bit disappointed that we weren't going to go as we have been religious in the past about taking our kids to many of the traveling shows without once thinking about the cost. But this time, in the midst of remodeling the kids' rooms and recouping from some extra summer expenses, I just could not even consider it.

At the last minute, this afternoon, Amanda called and was gracious enough to share two tickets with us to go with her and Addie. FOR FREE! I was almost a little too excited about going. I always get a little teary at events like this....... I know I'm a freak, but I just enjoy seeing my kids get to experience something that I think they will remember. And the tickets were free, it was worth a few tears of joy.......

Anyway, we met at the Convocation Center and found our seats. As we waited for the show to begin, the peddlers started to make their rounds trying to taunt the children with various treats and toys. Amanda and I decided to split a bag of cotton candy but at the last minute I decided to treat both the girls to a bag in thanks to Amanda and Addie for having us along.

What sweet joy....... cotton candy. All the girls (including Amanda and I) were enjoying the cotton candy when I looked at Amanda and she diverted her eyes and grinned a shy smile. I looked and saw two children in front of us watching every bite that went into our mouths. I couldn't help but laugh. Amanda's face was enough and who hasn't seen a kid who wants something. But then I looked closer. They weren't just watching. They were staring. Almost in disbelief. I looked next to them and noticed their mother who looked terribly uncomfortable in the sea of bow-headed girls and Elmo backpack clad little boys being overindulged.

I immediately started wondering what we should do. We both had come with very little cash and were trying to be frugal in our own spending. And the thoughts of handing them a chunk of our moist, half eaten, squashed cotton candy just didn't seem appropriate at the time.

At first, I was quick to judge. My job often leads me to my calloused idea that parents like this probably don't work and that they are too lazy or too self absorbed to be able to give more to their children. But as I tried to clear that from my head, I thought about how she probably had the same desires as I do to make our children happy.

The cotton candy suddenly felt gritty in my mouth. I felt guilty. Guilty for the cotton candy, guilty for the free tickets, guilty for the $8 pennant, guilty for the gas to drive to Jonesboro........ just plain guilty. Although I probably did not do the right thing in the situation (which was nothing, by the way), it was a humbling experience.

But on the other hand, I felt grateful. What a blessing is to be able to have what I have - what a joy to get to experience the simple things like 2 year old girls with sticky hands and sugar induced wiggles.

As the show started, the kids in front of us lost interest in our treats and were soon clapping and laughing to the songs of Elmo and his crew. Maybe they won't remember their craving for cotton candy by tomorrow, but thankfully, I will.

Thanks again, Amanda, for the tickets and the company. It was truly a blessing and, yes, I did choke back a few tears as I saw the girls dance and smile and get blue mouths from the yummy cotton candy. So many life lessons learned in just one little moment. But who could expect anything less from Sesame Street : )

Big Boy Room Redo

Tate and Avery's rooms were getting overrun with toys and furniture. We decided to downsize beds and clean out and clean up! It has taken us almost a month just to get one room "done". So, whether you like it or not, here are the end results for Tate's room. We are all pretty pleased with it. I wish I had taken before pictures. It was cramped, disorganized, and full of junk. Many of the toys have been moved upstairs to the "next on the list to redo" playroom. (I do still need to get a lamp. If anyone has any suggestions, feel free to let me know.)

Avery had to pose on the bed.

Ignore the upside down bank on top of the armoire. Tate broke the bottom and now all the change dumps out. Papaw will have to fix that....... This armoire was my Mema's and she gave it to us to use in Tate's room. His Papaw Bob built some shelves for it and, voila! I bought the CD/DVD holders on amazon.com and they have been great. I hung two in the playroom and one inside Avery's closet doors. Shrek looks like he's about to climb right out of that toy storage area at the bottom :)

Inspiration from The Nester led to the creation of this window "mistreatment". It is so hard to figure out what to do with this window because to hang a rod would be next to impossible because of the width and the fact that there is no way to attach it to the center of the window (I'm afraid it would sag something awful). But who needs rods, right? Just hang those ring clips up there with some upholstry tacks! I got the panels on clearance at Bed Bath & Beyond and found the striped fabric at Hancocks for next to nothing. The striped fabric is attached to the valance of the blinds with binder clips! I love being sneaky...... Consider yourself warned..... there are more mistreatments to come!

I'm thinking of backing some of these more open shelves with some nifty scrapbook paper for some more color in the room. What do you think? Tate's Papaw Bob gives him a wooden toy that he handcrafts for Christmas each year. He also made the bookcase.

My Child is a Genius......

Okay so maybe not. But I just didn't realize she could do this. She was drawing last night and this was her final product. She said it was our family. Sadly, we don't have legs but, luckily, we can fly.

Tateisms

For those of you who know my son personally, you know that he is a rather eccentric kid. Although his personality suggests "odd", we have always embraced his differences and hoped that others could view him as we do. This is a conversation from tonight:

Tate: "Mom, I just saw something cool on TV. It was a motocross vehicle. It had a steering wheel just like MarioKart Wii and you could steer it. And it popped a wheelie with just the push of a button."

Me: "Really? That sounds cool."

Tate: "Yeah, it was. You could steer it."

Pause

Tate: (in his best announcer voice, a bit under his breath) "Made by Tyco RC."

Prayer Request

Please be in prayer for my son, Tate. Although it's been said that "kids are resilient", I fear that childhood experiences can affect us emotionally later in life. Although I try to be a good parent and I am not EVER perfect, there are experiences and happenings in life that are out of my control.

I can not expound on what exactly he is going through, but I can tell you that he needs to feel the peace and love that only the Lord can give.

Thanks.

God My Shepherd, I don't need a thing!
(Psalms 23, The Message)

I have recently realized that I am a "wanter". Okay, enough with the snickers....... I know it's not an epiphany, but it has become more evident how much time I spend wanting things. I started wondering if there has ever been a day that I haven't wanted for something whether it be new shoes, a new bag, new floor coverings, a new bedspread, a new book, a new CD, clothes for the kids....... I go from one thing to the next.

With the rise in gas and food costs lately, my wants have become nagging. I worry about how hard it is getting to just "live" much less get what I "want". My spirits have not been too damp, however, and many times I am scrounging the house over trying to find something to sell on ebay to cover my next purchase.

But I question my desires. Is "want" a human characteristic that we can not squelch? Is wanting itself a sin or is it a sin only when those wants require so much that you can not rely on God for your fulfillment?

I want to rely on God for my fulfillment. I want to want less.

Just a Test......

This is simply a test to see if I can send posts from my phone....... Who knows if I ever will, but it's worth a try.

Friday Favorite

Well, I haven't been inspired to write great things lately. Not like I ever was writing great things but....... anyway, you're stuck with just another boring Friday favorite. This week it's Photoshop. The only place you can take a not so great photo and make it wall worthy. Or at least they are to me. But you know, I do have on my mommy goggles for one of these.

...... I love to see the pictures go to this



........from this.

.....or this nice picture of the nasty but infamous Bono bridge

......from this.

I've had Photoshop Elements 5.0 for about a year now and still know only a tiny bit about all there is to do with it. When I do discover one of those tiny tricks that can make worlds of difference in my photo, I feel like I've won the lottery. Now don't go thinkin' that you can just whip out the $80 bucks for the program, push two buttons and magically transform your pictures into a professional looking masterpiece. The learning curve is rough to say the least. However, it is rather gratifying to play around and know that you can always undo what mess you just created. I downloaded a free trial and played around for 30 days before I made the investment.

And if you are better at photoshop than me and you know all about layer masks and magnetic lassos and gradient maps and can see right through my shabby editing skills, save it for your own blog. But if you are a professed amateur like me, feel free to share your photoshop glories! I'd love to see them!

I'm tryin', Lord

Well, it's been a popsicle night.

For those of you that know me outside of this blog, you know what I mean. It either means supper was so horrible that my kids have resorted to about 15 popsicles afterward or that I was so "out of myself" that I was too disabled to fix supper and they had to resort to popsicles for nourishment. It's happened. I'll leave you to decide which actually happened.

Anyway, going back to work has been harder than I had imagined both emotionally and logistically. Rob has only been a real part of our family for about 35 hours in the last 7 days. This puts a real emotional and physical stress on me. We've also been trying to remodel the kids' bedrooms and are currently in the midst of chaos. I'm trying not to become discouraged about the coming school year with Rob and Tate going back to school. When Rob goes back, his time with us will be even more limited. Please pray for my strength. It may seem whiny and frivolous, but it is important. I need it. I commented on Amanda's blog about how I so admire single parents. I just don't have it in me.

Please also pray for Rob's safety. He is on the road a lot and many times, without much sleep. Sometimes I wonder why we thought this was such a good idea, but we have to remember that it is only a season and it will soon be over and we will forget what trouble it was.

Anyway (again), tomorrow Amanda, Kristi and I are headed to Searcy for a girl's overnighter to attend a Beth Moore simulcast. I need it BAD. There was actually a simulcast location in Jonesboro, but we thought a good excuse to spend the night was in order. And boy, did we know what we were doing when we thought of that!

Shalom out!